Lost Souls And Spilt Blood
by Liz-BefAndKiwibear
Summary: Just a funny gore/romance creepypasta of epicness where two not so ordinary people get caught up in some not so ordinary things. We don't own anything but our main characters (and the potato mobile). Rated MA for sexual content, violence, and language. Involves romantically: BEN DROWNED, Jeff, and Eyeless Jack. Please R&R! And trust me, the writing style gets MUCH better!
1. Chapter 1

**A2/N: Hi guys! Welcome to Lost Souls and Spilt Blood. Of course you already know that because you clicked on it... Anyway, I sencerly apologize because my tab button isn't working and when everything transfered over the ones I did have disappeared. So it's like, 3 o'clock in the morning and when I try to put a certain amount of spaces in manually it just disappears after I save it. So please forgive me that it's not properly structured. Also, enjoy the story, and heads up, the writing style does get a lot better later on. Please R &R!**

Gage and Warren wondered through the woods, obviously lost now. They had been wondering around for at least an hour since they had decided to go off the walking trail. The sun was starting to get lower in the sky and the air around them was cooling as night started to creep closer.

Gage looked around, "Man, we're lost." he said.

"Nah, really?" Warren snapped back sarcastically.

"Do you wanna keep going or stop? I'm getting tired." Gage said.

"How can we stop in the middle of the woods? We don't know what's out here!" Warren responded.

"It'll be dark soon, we should just stay put till morning." Gage said.

"Alright, fine." Warren sighed.

They put their back-packs down. The day had started out good, two friends going to enjoy a hike, but now they were lost in the woods. A cool breeze blew throughout the forest. It sent a shiver up Gage's spine. The light was fading quickly as they settled down for the night.

A loud crack made both men jump. They looked around frantically, but it was hard to tell what direction the sound came from.

"What was that?!" Warren whispered.

"I don't know!" Gage whispered back.

What sounded like a laugh came from up ahead of them. Warren shakily got up. "Hello?" he called out.

It seemed as if the whole forest went silent as they listened for a response.

"Lost?" a honey sweet woman's voice came from close-by.

"Yes! Can you help us?" Warren called.

"That depends..." the voice responded. The men thought they noticed a small Russian accent trailing behind every word she eerily said.

"On what?" Warren asked.

"Can you trust me?" the voice asked.

The two men looked at each other, confused. The person seemed like they would help the two, but it sounded a little sketchy at the same time.

"Yes?" Gage told the person.

"Good." the person said, there was definitely a bit of an accent.

Both men jumped back a bit as someone jumped out of a tree near them. The person landed softly on all fours, then stood up. It was a girl, who seemed to be eighteen or nineteen. She had on a dark-grey hoodie that cast a shadow on her face and wore plain jeans that fit her round butt _nicely_. She had hiking boots on that looked like something was stained on them. She lowered the hood and both the men gawked. In front of them was the most beautiful girl they had seen. Her luscious, long, straight hair was blonde and looked as soft as moonlight. Her eyes were a grayish-blue color that reminded them of the sky right before a storm came, entrapping their attention. Her face was outlined softly; everything about her seemed to compliment something else about her, making them slightly trust her more. And, God help them, but her hoodie surprisingly fit her big upper curves _very_ well. Complimenting her curves and an innocent run-way model face was a body that spoke a lifetime of climbing and running. The more they looked at her, the more she got even more beautiful than the last time.

The beautiful girl smiled with her perfect straight white teeth at Gage and Warren. They both noticed something weird, just a flash though; they just passed it as part of their imagination. "If you could just give us directions to get back to the trails..." Gage said.

The girl grinned, "You're far from any trails I know of, but I do know there's a road a few miles from here. I can walk you to it since its dark." she insisted.

Warren and Gage exchanged glances. "W-we'll just wait here till morning... so, which way was the road?" Warren asked, not wanting to disappoint the beautiful woman.

"I thought you said you would trust me. Do I scare you?" the girl asked eerily, as her beauty flickered for a second again, filling their hearts and souls with fear... What had they run into?

"N-no. We just... we're tired." Warren stuttered.

"Maybe we should help them 'sleep', don't you agree Liz-Bef?" the girl said, her form flickered again this time. It was a monster... she had sharp canine teeth instead of perfectly straight white ones, claws instead of fingernails, and her once luring and trusting smile turned into one that chilled them to the very marrow in their bones.

" _Da_." another voice said in Russian, with the same slight Russian accent, almost exactly as the... _thing_... in front of them.

Another girl came out to where the others were. She had jet black long straight hair that covered some of her eyes and smooth pale skin, like a vampire would have. Her eyes were an icy-blue color that could stop anyone cold in their tracks, framed with thick lashes and black eyeliner. She wore a low V-neck black shirt that fit her plump womanhood _exceedingly_ well. She had on a black cargo vest and black skinny jeans that fit her butt _very_ nicely. Along with the outfit, she had on a necklace that looked like a gray orb, and the misty contents inside seemed to be swirling. She looked about the same age as the first girl. Unlike the first girl though, this girl had sharp facial angles and a complimentary sharp body structure, lean, like she spends her life on the run. Everything about her was cold and distance, but they couldn't help but want to get closer to this, Liz-Bef, as the scary monster called her... But the look in her eyes stopped them cold as she stared deeply into their eyes, as if she could see right through them and pierce the very veil that separated fantasy from fear. Her eyes spoke a lifetime of pain and torture, like there was nothing left inside her but pain. On her right shoulder was a symbol about as big as their palms and, upon further inspection, saw that it was a pentagram. Their eyes filled with fear as they looked upon the Satanist. They had never seen one before. Oh, how things had changed.

"Wh-what do you want from us?!" Gage yelled backing away.

"Don't you wanna play?" the first girl asked.

"No! Get away from us!" Warren said, terrified.

"Well Kiwi, I think we should have a bit of fun with these two." Liz-Bef said.

"Yea, I agree." Kiwi responded.

Gage and Warren both took off running, knowing they were running for their lives.


	2. Chapter 2, Kiwi's POV

I smiled sweetly, enjoying the feeling of a chase coming on, as my prey ran ahead of me. I looked at Liz-Bef and we both nodded, having done this countless times. We waited 5 seconds and then we both sprinted after our prey. I took the one on the left, whom I'm assuming was Gage, and Liz-Bef took the one on the right, who was Warren. It was so interesting to watch humans sometimes; how they say they're friends but when it comes to life or death, they choose themselves over staying together. Like we predicted, they immediately split up; stupid humans. I easily closed in on my prey, where as I could easily see in the dark, this one was lucky not to run into a tree. My eyes narrowed as I glared at this petty human and jumped on his back. He fell to the ground with a grunt as the breath got knocked out of him and I chuckled darkly. I turned him over and pinned him with my knees on either side of his hips as I reached into my boot and pulled out my hunting knife. "Now, let's have some fun..." I said, giving a vague description of 'fun' as I took the knife and lightly slid it across his cheek, making a thin line of blood lazily drip down his face.

"P-please," he stuttered, "I-I'll do anything! I'll even be your sex toy!"

This made me chuckle... Humans and their need for physical contact... "I don't want your dick; I want you to feel pain." I curtly responded as I took the knife and slashed it across his chest horizontally, enjoying the sound of his flesh splitting and his body pump more and more blood. I took the knife and licked the blood off, relishing in its sweet tangy flavor. I could immediately tell that his blood type was O-, the best kind. I took my sharp claw that was attached to my pointer finger and scraped it diagonally from the side of his ribs to his lower abdomen on both sides. I chuckled darkly as I saw him bleeding and made my claw back into a finger and wiped some of the blood off and drank it. Oh, there was no other pleasure in the world than watching the life of someone drain out of them slowly. I laughed my hysteria laugh as I watched him bleeding slowly out. "LIZ-BEF!" I yelled out.

"WHAT?" She yelled back.

"THE WAFFLES ARE IN THE TOASTER!" I yelled. This was our code phrase for ' _someone's dying; quickly do as you wish!_ ' She was over by my side in about 5 seconds. Usually, she's faster but I guess she's saving her souls. Liz-Bef is a demon who harvests the souls of willing and unwilling victims and uses them for her own gain (and also for Satan) so she can do things like teleport and stuff with a certain amount of souls. I remember when we met; I can honestly say that I would never have predicted even destiny could come up with something like this. I immediately think back to the time we first met.


	3. Chapter 3, Flashback

7 YEARS AGO

I was in my home land Silent Hill lurking around looking for my next victims. A portal suddenly opened in the middle of the street and all I could see inside was a darkness that looked as thick as liquid but yet gave away to streams of mist that were curling around it. The portal was about as big as a full length mirror, and I sensed movement inside so I went around a near by corner really quick, but poked my head out so I could see what was happening on my turf. I saw a tallish dark figure slowly step out of the portal, it was a girl. Well, _girl_ might not be an appropriate word; she was indeed female; that was obvious from her big curves and slender body. It took me a little bit to identify her. She wasn't human, but had a human form, she certainly _looked_ human...

Her face snapped around to where I was, as icy blue eyes met my stormy grey ones. If I was human or any weaker creature from Silent Hill, I would have been petrified. After a few seconds, her eyebrows twitched into a curious glance. "Where am I and who are you?" She said chillingly. She had a voice of ice, and a look just as cold. Compelling, but also freezing, I would love to see the extent of her power, but it had no affect on me. I noticed that the portal behind her closed with an intake of air as it dispersed into nothingness, leaving only black wisps behind.

"I am your worst nightmare, and welcome to Hell..." I said as I lunged for her with my claws extended. She smoothly dogged my attack as if she expected it. Strange... nobody _ever_ dodges my attacks and lives. I lunged for her again and she easily evaded my attack... _again_... This lady was really starting to piss me off.

She chuckled darkly, "This may be _your_ Hell, but... _this_ ," I growled at how she simply referred to my home as _this. "_ Is nothing in comparison to what Hell really looks like... Now, tell me again... Where is this and who are you? Trust me; you do NOT want to get me pissed."

I thought for a moment, and then an idea hatched in my brain. "I'll tell you when you answer this question." She rolled her eyes. " _What_ are you?" I said in disgust. There was surprise in her eyes for just a second; and that was all I needed. I quickly lunged for her and tackled her onto the hard concrete. She hissed and her eyes flashed to black orbs with red pupils and then quickly back to normal.

" _THE FUCK IS WRONG-_ "I quickly covered her mouth. Not wanting to alert any creatures to our whereabouts; not that they would do anything. I'm one of the most feared creatures in Silent Hill along with Pyramid Head. But I didn't want anyone else to ruin my joy at what I just found. _A demon, a real live... or not... demon!_ I thought excitedly. Demons were rare to come by, and even rarer to see in Silent Hill.

The demon kicked me in the stomach and I jumped to the side. She got up and stared down at me with those cold eyes. My instincts told me to stay to the ground and wait for this demon to make the first move. "This is the last time I'm asking you, who are you and where am I?" she hissed at me. I pushed myself off the ground and stood up.

I looked around the streets, making sure we were the only ones here. "Well, if you wanna know so badly, you're in Silent Hill and the sirens just went off, so you're in the nightmare world part of it. I have a name, but I rather not share it... just called me Kiwibear." I told the demon matter-of-factly. She stood observing me, thinking about what I had said. She looked me over once; my clothes had blood stains on them, along with a couple tears from fights.

"What do I... um… call you?" I asked curiously, a demon could be your greatest ally. The demon's icy eyes shot back up to mine. She seemed confused that I didn't even flinch at her stare. It made me wonder what regular humans thought of this... thing.

"Since you won't tell me your real name, then you only get what I'm referred to as, Liz." she said.

I looked at her with my most innocent look, "I like Liz-Bef better." I said. She gave me a strange look, like she was trying to figure me out. We both were silent, in fact everything was silent. I let out a low growl, something wasn't right, it was never _this_ quiet. The demon stared at me, but sensed that something was odd.

The breath was knocked out of me as something rammed into my back. I hit the road with a hard thud. I cried out in pain as sharp teeth pierced my shoulder. To my surprise, I heard a gurgle and the teeth numbly slipped out of my shoulder as the corpse of the creature rolled off me. As I got up, my eyes went to the large knife sticking out of the creature's neck. Liz yanked it out of the corpse. "Thanks..." I told her and she nodded as she cleaned off the knife. It was a larger type of kitchen knife.

The creature's blood dripped onto the street. This one was a feral, one of the dog creatures of Silent Hill. It looked like a large dog that had no fur or skin. The insides could be seen through an almost transparent skin. Ferals' faces had no eyes or ears and the mouths were filled with long teeth. Blood dripped from them as they walked, even if there were no wounds. Usually they traveled in packs, so I wasn't sure why there was only one.

"I think we need to get off the street." I told the demon.

"Why? It was just one tiny _thing._ No threat at all." Liz said. I didn't like the way this demon had come in my territory, my home, and insulted it. I let out a deep growl. Liz put the knife to my throat and stared me in the eyes, the red flashed in them for a second.

"What? You think you scare me?" I snarled.

"You should be terrified, I could easily torture you till you begged for death." she coldly responded.

Both of us turned our attention to a sound that came from near-by. A sound that sounded like demented laughing was followed by the thumping sound.

"SHIT! ROMPERS!" I yelled.

"What the fuck is a Romper?" Liz said. As she finished her sentence, one jumped into our view.

Rompers looked like either humanoid or primate-like creatures. They had dull-brown skin and what looked like a belt around their neck. They had long, muscular arms and legs that they used to "romp" and jump around. Rompers were quick and tended to ram into their victims to knock them down and pin them. These creatures were aggressive and sometimes traveled in large groups, by the sound of it there was a bunch near-by.

When we realized that we were surrounded by many Rompers and Ferals, there was no real way to escape. There were at least fifteen Rompers, along with a pack of ten Ferals.

"I hope you know how to fight..." I mumbled.

A Feral ran full speed at us. I let out a loud growl and dodged the creature. The pack of Ferals started to circle us. This was weird since they had never attacked me before. A Feral lunged at us and Liz shoved the knife into its side. It yelped and another ran at us. I tackled it and another jumped on me. My claws dug into the other ones, the one I had pinned, neck. The other snapped at me and I clawed it's side open.

Liz said something that sounded like it was in another language and shadowy dogs appeared. They manifested out of thin air and looked as wispy as black fog, just like the portal. They went after and killed the rest of the Ferals and a few Rompers, then disappeared. Liz looked weaker after it, so I guessed she had used some type of demonic power.

A pair of Rompers circled her. She watched them carefully, every single move they made she seemed to see. They made the "laughing" sound that Rompers make and Liz laughed psychotically back. She made a quick movement and her knife pierced a Romper's throat. I jumped and tackled the other and ripped its stomach open. The scent of blood was so strong to me, so tempting, but Liz yanked me back up.

"They are leaving, why?" she asked me. I looked around and the rest of the Rompers were quickly making their way down the street.

"Usually when a creature runs... that means something else is about to show up..." I whimpered.

"You got that right." a woman said loudly. I knew the voice, pure hatred filled me. We turned to see Order members behind us. I understood why things were happening so close together, these cultists were trying to weaken me and the demon.

"Looks like we got the demon we sensed _and_ this creature." another said.

Liz glared at the Order members, "You are just weak humans, soon dead, soulless ones when I'm done with you." she said in a demonic voice.

The female Order member put down a pyramid-shaped item. My heart sank; they had the Flauros, which had trapped Alessa's Dream for so long now.

The monstrous creature trapped inside the sacred item was somewhat a demonic entity that the Order now controlled. It had red skin, red eyes, long claws and horns. This entity's fangs resembled a spider's and its face was bat-like. There were two tentacle-like things coming out of its back that seemed like wings that had never grown. Alessa's Dream was always said to be very violent and savage. It was a creature that needed to be, and was definitely, feared.

The Flauros started to glow as this beast was let out. It appeared barely four feet away from Liz and me. It was a massive creature, being about seven feet tall. We had to jump back as this hellish creature swung its claws at us. Liz started talking in another language, but it only caused the creature become more irritated. Fire swirled around the creature, then branched out and shot at us. I tackled Liz and we rolled out of the way.

Quickly, we got to our feet. Liz threw the knife at Alessa's Dream. The knife took out one of the monster's eyes. It furiously yelled in pain and pulled out the knife, throwing it to the ground afterwards.

The creature swept its arm at us again. Liz swiftly dodged it and I, not so gracefully, couldn't move quickly enough and went flying through the air. Pain shot through me as I hit the ground. The Order members laughed at me.

Liz dodged each of the beast's attacks easily. She used some type of power to stun the creature as she grabbed her knife. She stabbed the monster's chest, but it didn't seem to affect it much. It grabbed her by the neck and lifted her up, she seemed at a weakened state from using her powers now.

"YO! UGLY!" I yelled at Alessa's Dream. It looked straight at me and threw down Liz. I pushed myself off the ground and shakily stood up. The monster started to come towards me.

"COME ON! I DON'T GOT ALL DAY!" I shouted at the beast.

"You must have a death wish..." I heard Liz mumble.

The infuriated monster went after me. It clawed at me and raked across my stomach. I growled and dug my claws into its arm. Liz jumped on its back and shoved the knife in its shoulder. It slung her off and threw me across the ground. Both of us were tiring now. I built up a bit of energy.

"PYRAMID! HELP ME!" I screamed as loud as possible. I never yelled as loud as I had today. Usually I was quiet, but usually I didn't have a giant demon creature trying to kill me.

There was a low, but loud roar-like sound that responded to my scream for help. He had heard me; thank god he had heard me. Alessa's Dream looked around, confused. Liz looked about as confused and the Order members seemed terrified. Another low roar filled the air.

"PYRAMID!" I screamed again. It was like a twisted version of Marco-polo. The roar came again, very close now, he knew where we were. Liz stood up and Alessa's Dream started to build up fire. The fire shot out and went for Liz, but she put her hand up and the fire shot back at the monster. She was very weak now; whatever she used for powers was running low. She backed away, staring the creature in its remaining eye.

Liz suddenly teleported to my side, Alessa's Dream looked around confused. It saw she had come beside me and came towards us. Liz helped me up; I protectively stood in front of her, sensing she was weakened. This demon that I had seen as a threat only a little time ago, I was protecting.

The sound of scraping metal came from close-by. Pyramid Head, my protector and only friend had found us. There were different Pyramid Heads in Silent Hill, but this one was one of the bigger ones. He was at least seven feet tall, maybe a bit more. He drug a giant sword-like knife behind him. His arms were stained with blood, along with the long skirt he wore.

Alessa's Dream let out a hellish shriek. Pyramid growled deeply in response. The monster went towards Pyramid. It slashed at Pyramid and he caught its arm and ripped it off, Alessa's Dream let out a noise that sent shivers through my body. Pyramid threw the arm down. The demonic creature slashed Pyramid's side open and blood dripped. I let out a growl; Liz grabbed my arm and stopped me from moving.

Pyramid swung the giant sword and sliced Alessa's Dream in half. A bright light flashed as it went back into the Flauros and the Flauros disappeared. The Order members took off running. Liz was about to go after them, but I stopped her.

"They're already in this hell." I simply said.

I ran to Pyramid and hugged his side that wasn't bleeding. Liz walked over to us and looked up at Pyramid. I let go of Pyramid and turned to Liz.

"I guess I should thank you." she said dully. I looked up at Pyramid, then back at Liz.

"No thanks needed... you know, you're pretty awesome." I said.

"This guy, you called... Pyramid?" she asked.

"Yea, Pyramid Head. He's got man boobs, moobs." I said playfully and Liz laughed.

"Well, this was a lovely way to spend my Saturday," she said with a heavy layer of sarcasm. "If I ever want to deplenish my supply and almost die; I'll drop by for a quick visit." Liz said.

"Wait!" I pleaded and Liz looked at me. "Can you take me with you? Please?" I begged.

She thought about it a minute, "On one condition..." she told me, "you stay with me and kill people so I can steal their souls to get stronger." she said.

"Deal! I have to kill for blood anyways." I told her.

Pyramid thumped me on the back of the head. "Owe, you hooker!" I said. He put an arm around me and hugged me. "I'll miss you too buddy, I can always summon you. We can get drunk or something." I told him.

"You ever had vodka?" Liz asked.

"No..." I responded.

"We'll this ought to be interesting. Let's go then, I'm weak and need some souls and then we'll get some vodka." she told me.

"Alright." I said.

She put a hand on my shoulder and talked in another language. Black mist swirled around us and everything got dark. Once it got light again, I looked around. We were in a forest, outside of the Silent Hill dimension. Wow.


	4. Chapter 4, Kiwi's POV

PRESENT TIME

"Alright, now for the main course." Liz-Bef said as she squatted down near the soon to be dead victim. She did her language change thingy and I could see her eyes flash her demonic color, and then she closed her eyes and put out her hand to the spot that's near the center of his chest. I squinted hard, with this added focus; I could faintly see a little gray glow-ish light that looked wispy, come out from the center of his chest, and she breathed it in. She held her breath and then she sighed in pleasure and opened her eyes. "So," she said, breaking the silence. "You wanna go get some waffles?"

10 minutes later, after grabbing what money the two victims had, we were sitting in a Waffle House waiting for service. I put down the menu and decided to get just a regular waffle. I was just in that regular waffle mood. I looked around the empty Waffle House, about to call over a waiter, when I saw a boy in the corner booth. He had his white hoodie pulled down over some of his face, and raven black hair coming out from under his hood. He had his head tilted down so I couldn't see a lot of his face, but I could see that he had really pale skin. I wanted to see all of his face, so I looked at Liz-Bef, and raised a spoon. She raised her eyebrows in response and I motioned with my eyes to the spoon, then to the guy. She looked like she was holding back a laugh and motioned to have our menus ready to look innocent. I smiled and threw the spoon at the guy, making sure that the course would 100% hit him smack dab in the middle of his forehead. Right before it hit him, me and Liz-Bef made it look like we were looking at our menus the whole time.

I heard the contact of the spoon to his forehead and resisted the urge to laugh as we turned innocently to see what happened. "The fuck…?" I heard him mutter as he looked up at me and glared. Or rather, intensely stared; because he didn't have any eyelids. It took a second for me to match a name with a face, but his signature cut in smile triggered the name. Jeff the Killer. I had heard some stuff about him, but all I know is that he's a serial killer.

The waiter came up and broke our eye contact that seemed forever, and I ended up staring at the hips of our cute-ish male waiter. He had a nice body, built with some muscles, with fluffy dirty blond hair. He had a nice strong jaw with some stubble leading into a beautiful neck that pumped blood. Sweet, sweet blood. He looked about our age, but I wasn't really interested in a relationship. "Hey," he said, obviously flirting. I saw Liz-Bef respond to his flirting with a wink, and he grinned. God, I could smell his testosterone level rise. "Can I take your order?" He asked seductively; particularly to Liz-Bef.

"Yes," I said, and he turned to me. "I'll have two plain waffles with some hash browns scattered, covered, and chunked."

"Actually," Liz-Bef added, and he turned, happy to hear her voice, "can you make that two hash browns and an additional two chocolate chip waffles for me." She said smiling seductively. He had no idea what hid behind that pretty face she wore. I almost laughed as he took our menus and smiled at Liz-Bef. She too was looking like she was suppressing a laugh; he was hopelessly turned on. I motioned with my eyes for Liz-Bef to look at Jeff in the corner, and she realized who he was. She winked to me and mouthed, ' _watch_ '. She got up and went to the bathroom that was somewhat behind Jeff. A few seconds later Liz-Bef turned invisible and if I looked closely with my supernatural eyes, I could slightly see where light was bending around her body. I looked back at Jeff who was still looking at me, and I saw his hood be plucked down. He swung around confused and I laughed a little. Liz-Bef manifested in the bathroom I'm guessing cause I heard her flush, then about 10 seconds later she walked out. As soon as her back was to the frazzled murderer, a smile cracked on her face.

When she sat down, Jeff was still looking around wildly. It took all the self-control I had not to burst out laughing. The waiter came back a few minutes later with our food, and we had already formed another plan. David, our waiter, turned to Liz-Bef when he set the food down. "Anything else I can do for you?" He asked.

"Yes, actually, there is." She said, and he looked eager to do whatever she wanted. "Can you take this note and this butter over to the man over there?" She gestured with her head over to Jeff. He looked a tiny bit disappointed, but took the note from her hands. He started to walk away when Liz-Bef grabbed his arm seductively. I mentally face palmed at how easy this one was to get hard. "Oh ya; and don't tell him it's from us. It'll be our little secret." She said quietly. I laughed quietly when he was out of earshot and so did Liz-Bef. I saw the shock on Jeff's face when he read the note; I could almost read his eyes scanning the words I wrote in a dreamy handwriting on a piece of folded paper. ' _I have been watching you for a while now,_ ' the note read. ' _I have followed you everywhere you went, lurking in the shadows. I finally am going to confess something… I love you… take this butter as a sign of my love. Oh, and P.S.: … DAT ASS!'_ I almost blew our cover when out of the corner of my eye, I saw him look down at his butt. I silently continued eating my food, pretending to be completely ignorant to what was happening to Jeff.

Liz-Bef had her back to Jeff, so she couldn't see his expression to our note. I glanced back over at him and froze as I made eye-contact once again. A grin went across my face, "I'd tap dat." I mouthed to him. He stared at me, looked at the note, then back up.

"Dat ass!" I yelled across the mostly quiet place. Liz-Bef facepalmed and looked at me.

"Kiwi! Shut up." she said laughing; knowing that Jeff knew it was us messing with him now. I busted out laughing too, not daring to look back in the killer's direction.

The waiter came back over, the smell of his human hormones were overwhelming. I gave Liz-Bef a look that meant I needed to take a second to get away from that scent. She would probably convince him to come with us so that we could murder him.

"I'll be back, give you two some... alone time." I said trying not to laugh. I looked back as I went to the front door. Liz-Bef was talking to David, who obviously had a boner. Human seemed so weak to her powers. I walked outside to the fresher air; the door seemed to take a minute to close. The scent of drying blood suddenly was in the air. I turned to see Jeff had followed me outside. "Are you pissed cause I was talking about your ass?" I said innocently.

"Who the fuck do you think you are to think you can get away with that?!" Jeff yelled.

"I'm the almighty, the awesome, the derpy..." I paused for dramatic effect. "KIWIBEAR!" I yelled, kicked him in the nuts, and ran back inside.

I sat back down at the table with Liz-Bef. "You ran back in here quick, see a spider or something?" she asked.

"No, if I saw a spider I'd be running and screaming... at least Mr. Boner isn't trying to get in yo ass at the moment, his scent was way too strong." I told her.

"How long have you been awake Kiwi?" she asked laughing.

"I don't know... longer than I should've been." I said innocently.

"We can go home after this." she said.

"Thankfully Mr. Boner is gone." I muttered.

"I know right!" she said equally annoyed with the petty human.

"How much longer do you think before this one will tag along?" I asked.

"He'll be off by about the time we finish eating, I talked him into a dessert. Then after I'm done with him, we can-"

"GO TO SLEEP!" Jeff yelled. David looked out the window of the kitchen. I jumped in surprise and fell in the floor, Liz laughed at me. Jeff walked over, obviously pissed at me. "Do you think that I won't kill you?!" he yelled. I noticed the knife in his hand and quickly got up. He moved to stab me and I punched him in the face. He stumbled back and fell down. Liz-Bef started laughing at him now.

"Kick his ass Kiwi!" Liz-Bef shouted.

"Stupid bitch." Jeff mumbled as he got up. I grabbed him by the front of his hoodie and yanked him down to my boob level, smothering him.

"Listen, I'm not in the mood, I'm tired, it's been a long day, my waffles have gotten cold, and I won't hesitate to rip your intestines out and choke you with them." I threatened with a growl, Liz-Bef was laughing uncontrollably now.

I yelped in pain as a knife went into my side. Liz-Bef jumped up, for once taking this seriously, but I motioned her to stay where she was. Jeff yanked the knife back out and I kicked him in the stomach. He stumbled backwards a few steps. A deep growl escaped my throat. "Ohhh, you're going to get your ass kicked now bitch!" Liz said watching, obviously entertained. David was staring out of the kitchen, but had a look of fear on his face and didn't want to get into this fight.

Jeff went for me again. I dodged easily, like Liz-Bef had taught me to. He turned back to me and I raked my claws across his stomach. Fresh blood dripped from the wound as I scratched him a second time, much deeper than the first. The smell of his blood was strong. If I hadn't had blood earlier, I would have killed him right then.

The knife got ripped from his hand by Liz. I grinned at her as she handed it to me. My blood dripped off of it, it turned a mixture of deep red and black as it hit the floor. She stared at Jeff, one of her cold, demonic stares. The fear showed in his face. I put the knife up to his neck, "Leave now and you can live." Liz whispered demonically. Jeff slowly reached up and took his knife from my hand, quickly backed away, and got out of the building, almost running then.

"I think he got pissed about me talking about his ass." I said with a grin.

"Yea really... look who's coming back, I got this." Liz said as David came back.

"What was that about?! Do I need to call the police?" he asked frantically.

"No need for that." Liz-Bef said seductively, sticking out her hips a little. His hormones came back immediately, they were stronger than before. "You said your shift ends soon? Why don't you come with us afterwards?" she said putting a hand on his arm. This human was so weak that it was somewhat funny.

"Yea. I get off in about ten minutes." David said. Liz-Bef smiled at him and he walked back to the kitchen.

"Someone was horny." I mumbled.

"I want to have a little 'fun' with this one." she said.

I started laughing, "You're gonna fuck that?" I said in a low voice.

She nodded, "Why not? You can go sleep when we get home." she said.

"If you don't get too loud." I joked.

After we finished eating and David got off, we left. I was glad we convinced him to walk to our house; I wouldn't have been able to breathe if we had gotten stuck in a car ride with this man.

The house we lived in was actually a house from one of Liz's victims. She had the house before we had met; it was the first house I had ever been in that didn't have weird creatures in it. It was a two-story house; it was a pretty good sized one too. I suddenly saw a lizard, "LOOK AT THE LIZARD!" I yelled and took off after it.


	5. Chapter 5, Liz-Bef

**SMUT WARNING! And we don't own anything we may make references to, everything we DO make references to will be itillised or however you spell it. Enjoy.**

I led him up to my room with him not so far behind. Wanting to get this over with, I reluctantly, yet not so reluctantly, opened the door revealing my king-size black bed. I walked into my room taking off my shirt in the process, dropping it on my black carpet floor that held the past screams of my previous victims. I turned around to see him taking his shirt off also, revealing a flattish stomach. I quickly kicked off my shoes and unbuttoned my pants, shedding there suction-like hold on my legs, sliding onto my silky bed and waited while he finished undressing. I quickly looked myself up and down to make sure I didn't appear unattractive as to drive away my delicious soul. What I saw was my giant boobs overflowing my lace bra, and my slim stomach leading down to my curvy hips which held the foundation for my lady boxers. Nothing was wrong I confirmed as he got into bed with me, holding me greedily to him as he attacked my neck with the soft mushing of his lips and the occasional flick of his tongue. I leaned my head back, letting my body enjoy the pleasure that I felt. It had been a while since I'd had sex, so this felt great, I could feel the lust rushing inside me like liquid fire. He moved his hands down to cup my large breasts then quickly took off my bra, setting my girls free. THANK SATAN! It had been a really long day and my bra was a hook tighter because I was in a hurry this morning. After that monstrosity was off my chest he went back to caressing my sore boobs while trailing kisses down my neck. I moaned freely as he tenderized my boobs, massaging them and playing with my hard nipples as he trailed his lips across my collar bone. I felt my breathing quicken as he drug his mouth across my chest, yearning for him to just hurry up and take care of the need that was starting to flare to life between my legs. Finally his mouth made it to my hard nipple, after taking his sweet time, nipping at it lightly and swirling his tongue. Hallelujah praise Satan, the boy finally slid one of his hands down to my wetness and started teasing my clit and with his other hand was fondling my nipple that wasn't encased in his warm hot mouth. As I felt his hand get soaked in my juices, I also felt my need and want beginning to weld up inside me to unbearable extents. "Hey... What religion are you?" I asked between moans.

He looked up at me asking with his eyes if I was serious; still continuing to pleasure me, and behind my lust filled gaze, I was serious. He licked up the underside of my nipple coming off to reply simply, "Atheist." He said this while pulling his hand from teasing my clit up to his mouth and slowly licking off my glistening moistness from his fingers. Dear Satan that was so sexy. He switched to claim my other nipple with his mouth as he fondled the other one with his hand that was previously teasing me. He continued teasing me by running his fingers lightly over my entrance, inducing a moan of annoyance and anticipation out of me, little bastard. I dragged my nails down his abdomen and past his boxer line to his massive hardness and wrapped my hand around it in a vise-like grip and began moving it up and down. I heard him start to moan so I guess my point was finally getting across. He stopped teasing me and finally got down to business and slipped a finger inside me as I moaned with pleasure. He started pumping me and soon after added a second finger, I started to feel a warmth light up my inner core. I moaned as he added a third finger inside me just to make sure I fit him, he sure did think a lot about himself. He then took off his boxers as I followed suit and in the blink of an eye he was back on top of me about to penetrate me with his full nine inch hard dick. Seems fun enough, he's small compared to other dicks I've fucked but, they were paranormal. For a human I'm pretty lucky I found this delicious morsel, one of the perks of being a demon is that I'm able to grant great sexual pleasure to any man or woman. He pushed inside me, caught between going slow for me to adjust and wanting to ram me into the head board. He gave up on my feelings and pushed his full length inside me roughly, using the blood from my quickly healing womanhood and my natural moistness as a lubricant. Thanks to my demonic powers, I healed quicker and was able to handle him inside me better than other women with my virgin-like tightness. It also doesn't hurt me as much as it should, compared to a human virgin at least. I groaned involuntarily and he ignored me as he pulled almost all the way out, only to ram quickly back into me again. I could feel my tight inner walls clenching around his pulsating member that repeatedly went in and out of me quickly. He wasn't phased by the slightest that I could actually fit all of him in me, as to where with any other person he'd have some left out. I was repulsed yet intrigued by this mortal inside me, "F-faster." I moaned out. He just grunted in response as he did as he was told and began moving at a faster pace, starting to appease my senses further. I could start to feel him reaching his climax and I was somewhat near mine as moans flew left and right. "Switch with me." I told him.

"Alright." He agreed and we switched places to where I was on top. Once I got situated, I began to ride him as my boobs started to bounce uncontrollably. In this position he finally began to hit my G-spot and I felt me nearing my climax as I started moaning more frequently. Then I came. My muscles tightening around him gloriously and with this new found clenching he stuttered out some cuss words as he shot his load all over my insides. I gave this position a few more ups and downs to ride out our orgasms as my juice mixed with his cum on my bed sheets. _'FUCK! I'ma have to clean this up!'_ I thought sourly as I looked down on our mess and him. Now was my chance, or at least my best chance to get his soul. My eyes turned into black orbs with tiny red pupils as I began chanting my prayer, waiting for him to open his eyes in curiosity.

I began to chant my prayer of offering to Satan in Latin. He opened his eyes in curiosity and shrank back into my bed, paralyzed by fear. I got off his now soft member and held him down firmly with my upper and lower limbs. Continuing my chant, I began to stare at the man's soul, willing it to come out of his body. It did as I wanted, leaving the paralyzed man frozen to my sheets. I finished my ritual as the soul slipped into my necklace that was on my bedside table.

I looked back on the still alive human who had a glazed over look in his eyes. Disgusted I pulled a knife from one of my drawers and a big container, beginning my routine. I slit the man's wrist and held the container underneath to catch all the blood for Kiwi. I knew it would take a while for the blood to drain, so I decided to take a shower. When I was done he was long past drained, and so just to make sure that he was all the way gone, I stabbed his heart because our cat, Kakashi, didn't like them alive. I mean he would eat them alive, but he just preferred dead bodies. He was kinda like a fluffy human disposable system. I lidded the huge container and put on a soft _Captain America_ shirt and my REALLY soft _Wii_ pants as I called Kakashi to come and eat the dead corpse that was currently occupying my bed. I unlocked my door and our fluffy grey cat walked in purring and rubbing against my leg. I smiled and leaned down to pet Kakashi, rubbing his shedding fur off my hand after a good little love'ns. Kakashi's eyes contracted when he smelled the dead body and I could see his teeth getting sharper as he neared the dead morsel. The cute medium sized fluff ball hopped on my bed and devoured him, bones and all in a mere blur of teeth and speed only lasting a few seconds. He looked up to me with his one silver and one green eye and meowed cutely, as if asking, _'That's it?'_ I laughed out loud as I grabbed Kakashi, lifting him off the bed and took him with me and the container downstairs to Kiwi to finish watching the _SpongeBob_ episode that was currently on.

"Sweet mother Teresa on the hood of a Mercedes Benz, I am fucking tired!" I exclaimed with a yawn after I had put the blood in the refrigerator and plopped down beside her.

Kiwi held back a laugh, "By the sounds of it I wouldn't doubt it." She managed to slip a little giggle as she reached over to pet Kakashi.

"Oh shut up ya virgin." I said half heartedly.

"You first nymphomaniac." She replied with equal effort. I just stuck my tongue out in response in a tiredly anime fashion. Kakashi started purring in my lap while rubbing derpily into Kiwi's hand. Kiwi cocked her head to the side in concentration, "Do you hear that?" She asked unsure.

I furrowed my brow in concentration and checked the force field I had set up around our property. If there was someone near it, I would automatically sense it. "Yeah, there's someone near the border, I can't tell who though." I stated tiredly. "But wait! Their-their power level! It-It's! IT'S OVER NINE THOUSAND!" I yelled jokingly, pretending that I was Vegeta from _Dragon Ball Z_. Me and Kiwi both burst out laughing at the reference to one of my favorite animes. "Don't worry, I'll take care of it when I get up." I said after we were done laughing.

"Otay" she said derpily. After another episode of _SpongeBob_ and sensing the person getting closer, I finally got off my lazy ass and opened the door, standing in the doorway. Feeling the person freeze I inhaled and spoke loudly so that my voice would carry to where he was at.

"Hey! We know you're out there! Just wanted you to know, that we can kill you very easily! Well... I think that's it, we're gonna go to bed, I suggest you do the same. Good night, sleep tight, don't let our cat bite! Oh yeah! Beware of giant cat turds! Get some rest, Satan be with you!" I finished and went back inside to an applauding Kiwi. I bowed then locked the door, just in case they didn't heed my warnings. "Ima go to bed, night Kiwi,"

"Night Liz-Bef!" She replied tiredly.

"Night Kakashi." He just meowed in response. I turned to my right and walked up the wood stairs that were against the wall, trailing my hand lazily along the wood and metal railing till I got to the second floor. Once I was at the top I walked straight and found my room just as I left it, sighing with a grunt at the fact that I forgot to change my sheets. I yanked them off and threw them at the door, too tired to go back downstairs and properly take care of them. I walked around my bed to my dresser and found my extra set of sheets that I always kept for incidents like this and dressed the bed sloppily, only to collapse on it and fall into a dreamless sleep soon after.

"I WANT WAFFLES!" Kiwi screamed as she dive-bombed the bed.

"AHHHH! WHAT THE HELL?!" I said soon laughing off the almost heart attack. "Ohaiyo Senpai Kiwi-san." I said now fully awake, as she just derpily smiled back.

"Hey!" She said beaming with happiness. "Can you make thy Kiwibear some waffles?"

"Sure just let me get dressed." I said as I walked over to my dresser and pulled out my favorite double D bra and threw it on the bed for me to change into. I then went over to the other wall where my walk in closet was and looked through my options. I decided to dress sexy to day because, well, I felt like it. I picked up a black sleeveless see through-ish shirt that had a silver skull with some gold vines on the front and was complete black lace down the back. I pulled out some black booty shorts and grabbed my mid thigh high black socks and the suspenders for it as I threw those on my bed as well. I decided to go all out and grabbed my black lace panties and threw them in the mix. "Chu' think Kiwi?" I asked coming out of the closet, I really wanted her honest opinion.

"Cool." She said after careful meditation while stroking Kakashi. I smiled at her approval as I began to strip and Kiwi snorted.

"What? Is there something on me?" As I began frantically inspecting my almost naked body.

"MAKE IT RAIN!" She said as she started throwing imaginary money at me. I laughed and did a little dance and soon we were both laughing our asses off. I got dressed inspecting myself in the mirror before I left my room, grabbing my dirty sheets, and started skipping to the kitchen. I settled for a walk as I began to feel and sound a little like Ukraine from _Hetalia_ , the only thing was I started to hear the ripping of fabric but couldn't tell where it was coming from. This bothered me until I decided to push it off and started making waffles for Kiwi and me after I put the laundry in the washer. Just as I put the batter on the waffle iron Kiwi came happily bounding in with Kakashi soon after. She got everything out that we needed and set it beside the waffle iron and waited, intensely staring at the iron as if she could hurry along the process just by looking at it the right way. She scrunched her eyebrows, staring harder, and when she did the light turned green signifying that the waffle was ready. "YAY!" Kiwi exclaimed in happiness as I took the waffle out and put it on her plate starting another one for me. She took her plate, filled a cup up with blood and took her waffle into the living room after adding some waffle accessories. I filled a cup up with milk for me when my waffle was done and added some chocolate chips and syrup to complete my golden brown guilty pleasure.

"How many more do you want?" I asked so I could know weather I was gonna start another one or not.

"Ahhhhhhh, just one more."

"Okay." I replied happily and started a second one for her, eating my waffle in the kitchen while waiting. When it was done I picked up the hot waffle and ran into the living room which was right beside the kitchen. "Hot, hot, hot!" I muttered as I hurriedly set it on Kiwi's plate while she laughed at my pain.

"Thankd you Liz-Bef!" She said happily with some of the other waffle still in her mouth.

"Ja welcome." I said as I blew on my hand while walking back in the kitchen making another one for me. When I was done eating I went and got Kiwi's plate to wash off the syrup before it dried and got really hard to clean.

When I walked in the room Kiwi turned her head slightly to me, "Do you hear a ripping sound?" she asked.

"Ya, but I don't know where it's coming from." I replied as I walked back into the kitchen cleaning up the mess I made. I came back in the living room plopping on the sofa this time and put my feet up on the coffee table. The ripping sound kept getting louder and we both were getting annoyed with it. To get our minds off it, I asked her a question. "So, did you dream last night?"

She muted the TV and turned to me excitedly. "Ya! It was awesome! You were in it and that weird guy from last night was in it too. So what happened was I was back in Silent Hill and I was walking my turf with Pyramid Head and then all of a sudden a sparkly unicorn appeared! So I went up to pet it and it said telepathically, 'Get on my back!' all majestic like so I did and it was soft and fluffy like a cow. Then we flew away and some how crossed into this dimension and was at the waffle house with you and Jeff there! Then, you got on it's back with me and the unicorn went over and kicked Jeff in the nuts and we flew away!" She paused to take a breath as I laughed at Jeff's dream pain. "Then all of a sudden we were under attack by some flying dildos and you and the unicorn were like, shooting lasers out of your mouths and I was like, 'What's goin' on?!' and then you farted and they caught on fire and I woke up. The End!" She finished smiling.

Once I caught my breath from laughing I said, "Oh my Satan that's amazing!" as I wiped a tear from my eye.

"So, did you dream?" She asked.

"No, I haven't in a while..." I said sadly.

"Awww." She said as she un-muted the TV. "Hey, did that guy go away?" She asked during a commercial.

"I guess so, I didn't wake up last night so... I can check though now to see if he's still there."

"Otay." She said as she waited patiently.

"Yeah, but this time he's further away and in a tree. He doesn't seem to be moving, maybe he's still asleep?" I offered.

"But the sun's up... Maybe he's waiting for us to do something like go outside?" She purposed.

"Maybe, but damn! That ripping sounds getting annoying!" I complained.

"Ya, I might be wrong but it sounds like it's coming from your boobs." She stated with a little bit of doubt as we both looked down at my bulging chest. "Maybe it's your bra?"

"But this is my favorite bra! It can't be ripping now!" I said not wanting for this to be the end.

"Well, take it off and see if the ripping sound continues." She suggested.

"Okay." I muttered sadly as I took off my shirt and began to take the straps off to my bra. _'Please don't let this be the end, don't let this be the end!'_ I repeated in my head. Just as I was about to unhook it, it shot off my chest with incredible speed, making my girls burst free and making a loud ' _POP!'_ as it collided with the wall. "NOOOOOOOOO!" I screamed as I went to the side of my beloved bra, now broken beyond all control. I knelt over desperately trying to see if there was anyway I could salvage it.

Just then, the front door swung open and I whipped my head around to see who dared intrude upon my moment of distress and mourning, eyes my natural demonic color. Jeff stands in the doorway with a confused look on his face as he takes in the scene. Next thing you know I start to see some blood trickling down from his nose as he stutters trying to explain himself, only angering me more. I leap off the floor, not caring that I wasn't wearing a bra, and jumped over the couch in one smooth motion. Using the jump as a boost, I punched him in the stomach sending him flying backwards, leaving a resonating ' _crunch'_ from his ribs breaking ringing through the air. I held that position for a second before spin kicking the door shut only to burst out into tears over my fallen comrade. Kiwi, suppressing laughter, hopped over the couch tripping over the top in the process. She ended up face planting into the ground making me laugh a little. She jumped up and squatted down next to me petting my head in an attempt to sooth me. I leaned into her affection, resting my head on her collarbone as she started whispering comforting words in my ear.

"How about we take a trip to the _Victoria Secret_ and get you a better bra? How does that sound?" She asked, calming me down like only she can.

I sniffled one last time and wiped my eyes before muttering, "That seems cool... Plus we can get some fandom shirts?" I suggested.

She laughed and helped me stand up and said happily, "Yeah!"

"Viking burial?" I suggested as I walked over to our downstairs bathroom in the top right hand corner of the house, breezed through our revolving door, and filled up the porcelain tub.

"I'm gonna go get some twigs from outside to make a makeshift raft." Kiwi yelled somewhat as she went out the back door that was right beside the bathroom wall. I sat there sniffling until the water was full and went to go get a lighter and some sort of rope. I met Kiwi on the way back to the bathroom and she clenched her fist around what she had, raising it to the sky. I half expected to see _'Achievement Unlocked'_ out of the corner of my eye. Smiling and laughing a little at this, I then took the twigs and the yarn I had and made a ghetto raft. Finally I put it in the water with my beloved bra on top.

"Do you mind if-if I say a few words?" I asked quietly.

"Go for it." She said, pretending to be somber.

I nodded as I lit the bra and began, "You were an amazing bra, always there for me when I felt like dressing up. Always there for me whenever and wherever you were needed. You were the softest bra I owned, and the one that smelled the nicest!" A tear slipped from my saddened demonic eyes. "You were the best bra any demon could own!" I yelled dramatically. "But, I know that you would have wanted me to move on and find another one, to be strong yet sexy without you. And for that, you have my deepest condolences. You will be missed!" I finished as I cried my last tears and watched my beloved bra burn.

"... So do we just let it burn orrr…" Kiwi pondered out loud.

This had me stumped for a minute. "Um, I'm not sure actually… It just seemed like a really cool idea." My eyes widened as I saw the fire from the bra grow and catch the raft on fire. "Uhh…" I used my demonic powers to push the flaming boat down to the bottom of the tub, giving off a nervous chuckle then screaming when the water caught on fire. "WHAT THE FUCK?! HOW?!" I yelled, slowly backing away with Kiwi and watched in horror as our porcelain tub caught on fire. That's impossible! None of what just caught on fire was flammable at all! The flames from the tub spread to the curtains and the tiles. The tiles were fucking stone for crying out loud!

"Shit! Stop drop and roll Liz-Bef! STOP DROP AND ROLL!" she yelled pushing me towards the revolving door.

"I'M NOT ON FIRE KIWI!" I yelled back to her leaning on the door to make it start revolving. Only it was jammed, and wouldn't let us through. "SHIT! IT'S STUCK KIWI!" I yelled at her. I was about to use my demonic powers when Kiwi's body decided that that was the best possible time in the world for her to have gas. As Kiwi's fart echoed the flaming room, the flames of an explosion erupted; forcing the door forward. My body hit the floor a few feet away from the bathroom door. The sting of burning flesh covered my back, but I immediately looked around for my aggressively gassy comrade. "KIWI!" I blurted when I saw her laying on her side. Even though I knew she'd been worse off before, I ran over to her ignoring my own injuries. I felt her side looking for anything broken or hurt, finding a few broken ribs. I pressed around more and she farted again. Backing away quickly and covering my nose I confirmed, "Yep, you're okay…". By the time she sat up I was on the other side of the room, trying to escape her lethal gas cloud.

Holding my breath I walked over to her and slapped her butt, using one of my souls to heal her completely. I looked down at my slightly charred pants and quickly healing back, deciding to go get dressed. I went up to my room calling for Kiwi to stop farting and be ready to go in about ten minutes. I chose a new bra and a new pair of socks, put them on, and jogged downstairs to get my shirt from earlier. I swooped down, picked it up and put it on, throwing my shoes on aggressively. "SEE YOU AT THE POTATO!" I called over to Kiwi.

"KAAYYY!" She yelled back, probably grabbing a juice box from the fridge.

I grabbed the reins off of the coat rack by the door and headed out to our garage. Passing our three cars, I finally made it to our giant potato, putting the reins on and straddling it. I waited patiently for Kiwi to come out since our potato wouldn't start or work without both of us. I watched as Kiwi came derpily running out carrying a juice box and got on behind me. Immediately the potato hummed to life, hovering off the ground. I steared it with the reins, Kiwi holding on to me loosely, up and above the tree line. Sometimes I would pretend it was a motorcycle and lean into it, making sound effects as I went. To normal humans, the potato had a cloaking device that made it invisible, enabling us to leave it wherever. We eventually made it to the mall, me choosing to park in the middle of the sidewalk. It was funny to see other people run into it. I walked inside ignoring the stares of other people around me, either out of confusion or lust, I honestly just didn't care. " _Hot Topic_ , or _Victoria Secret_ first?" I questioned Kiwi, because I honestly couldn't choose.

"Ummm, which ever one's closer I guess." My blonde friend replied.

"Kay!" I replied spotting the _Hot Topic_ a few stores down. I grabbed Kiwi's hand, swinging it happily as I walked into the store and immediately geeked out. In about forty five minutes I was ready to check out, loaded with a bunch of different fandom shirts, dresses, and accessories. The man at the register gave me a conflicted look of confusion and lust.

"Nice tattoo." He said nodding his head in the direction of my pentagram.

"Thanks." I said, smoothly blocking him from conversation with a blunt reply. I pulled out my _Legend of Zelda_ wallet that had the triforce on it. Ever since electronics had started advancing, I had become intrigued by them. Hell I still had my _NES_. I ended up paying a little over two hundred dollars for my love of fandoms and left. We made our way around to _Victoria Secret_ and entered, catching the gazes of the guys around the area. I started looking around, Kiwi derpily following behind.

"I bet you like the posters, huh?" Kiwi said slyly motioning to the posters of the almost naked women.

"Why would I?" I questioned confusedly.

Kiwi's eyes went big as she realized her mistake, "Uh, uh, sorry! Wrong dimension!" She stuttered. I just gave her a confused look and continued walking around. I saw this worker coming towards us and looked up. She was a pretty girl, with natural dark red-brown hair and soft looking skin. Her dark green eyes that had flecks of brown in them were framed by a thin line of black eyeliner and mascara, accented by her brown eyebrows. Freckles speckled her pale porcelain face. I noted that she was really short compared to us, but looked about our age, with a lustful look in her eyes.

Looking me up and down, her eyes locking onto my breasts for brief moments, she asked, "Can I help you guys? Do you need to be measured?" She asked the last part staring at my breasts.

I gave her a weird look and said, "No, I'm a big girl; I know my size. Kiwi, you good?".

Kiwi just shrugged and this lady pounced on her opportunity to touch my big breasted friend. "Well here, come into the back and I'll measure you." She said leading her into the back. Kiwi gave me this 'Help me!' look; I just snickered and followed. I stopped to look at bras a few times, picking out some and putting them over my arm since I didn't have a basket. I walked over to the changing room seeing a scared Kiwibear looking like she got raped. I just stifled a laugh and asked for her size so I could be on the look out for some bras.

"36 D." She simply told me. I looked at her bare chest, taking in and memorizing the measurements so I could improve my based-on-sight-bra-size. Right before I was about to go look for some bras for her, I heard a commotion outside of the dressing room area. I was about to go see who it was so I could shut them the hell up when I heard the helper we had, I think her name was Savannah, threaten them. I heard the snap of elastic, an angry grunt, and the sound of footsteps getting closer. Next thing I know, Jeff comes barreling around the corner with a thong on his head. Remembering that Kiwi was bare torsoed, I quickly lunged across the space and kicked him right in the balls. I saw blood slowly trickle out of his nose as his eyes rolled to the back of his head. I watched with merciless eyes as he collapsed on the floor.

I turned back to Kiwi, "I'll go look for some bras for you. If you get dressed you can come out and help me." She nodded with a smile as if there wasn't a man laying on the floor with his nuts crushed. I ignored the look Savannah was giving me and continued on looking for bras, underwear, and lingerie. Kiwi came out and joined me as we looked around, buying what we had grabbed and a bottle of _Seduction_ because it smelled amazing. We walked out to the potato and popped the triangle trunk, putting our bags in there. I got on with Kiwi being right behind me and it started to hover, buzzing to life. I chose a car camouflage and drove on the road because it was frankly just a nice day out.

I was enjoying the ride when I suddenly saw a yard sale sign. What caught my attention was not the fact that it was a yard sale, but a video game yard sale. I saw the quickly approaching entrance and slammed on the brakes, causing Kiwi to slam her face on me. Hard. I jumped out of the nearest exit that lead me to the driveway, which happened to be the window. Mentally singing _Get Low_ by _Lil Jon & East Side Boyz _as I flew out of the window and ran across the street, hopping over oncoming traffic. I ignored the chaos I left in my wake and went right over to the creepy old man in charge. He showed me his collection and as I browsed I noticed some really cool old games you can't really find anywhere. I pointed to a blank cartridge and asked the twitchy old man what it was.

He picked it up and said, "Um, it was Majora's Mask... For the... 64...? Something like that. I-It's $3 i-if you want it." I really didn't like the vibes this creep gave off, but I couldn't refuse a deal like that. Plus my _Nintendo 64_ was still in surprisingly good condition, and I am a _Legend of Zelda_ fan. I took the cartridge from the old man's shaky hands and he rubbed them together like he was putting on lotion. I looked around the creepy place some more, finding a few more game deals. I paid the twitchy old man and left, putting my new treasures in the trunk. I noticed that Kiwi was laying limp on the current work of magic, and kind of felt bad cause it was me who knocked her out in the first place. I scooted her up and wrapped my arms around her, sitting her up to where I could hold her and steer. Once we got home I sighed as I parked the now original potato. Careful not to let the still unconscious Kiwibear fall flat on her face, I got out and stood by her side debating how to carry her in. I finally just shrugged and drug her off, not really caring as her feet hit the steps limply. I set her on the couch, letting her lay there momentarily as I went back and forth getting the bags and setting them inside. I sighed once everything but my new game was up, putting it down on the coffee table until I could hook it up. I sat Kiwi up and put her feet stretched out across the coffee table, grabbing a warm wash cloth and cleaning up some of the blood on her face. She looked so peaceful when she slept. That sincere thought was interrupted by Kiwi snoring and rolling over. I stifled a laugh as I just stood there, reflecting on what just happened.

Once I got over the shock I went up to my room, digging around until I found my _Nintendo 64_ console. I smiled and brought it down, hooking it up to the huge TV in the living room. I grabbed a marker before I sat down and leaned over Kiwibear's face. I held back a laugh as I doodled on her face, desecrating her perfect blemishless face with crude humor. Once I was satisfied I put in Majora's Mask, grabbed a controller, and got comfy. _'This is gonna be fun.'_ I thought as I put my feet on the coffee table and hit start.


End file.
